I too am a cuck, over over 7 years now, so its reassuring to read of another cuck's encounters and emotions as we set out on this rollercoaster.... of how our desires and feelings have evolved over this time. It sounds like we have a lot in common.
My wife's lover is also her work colleague. He obviously fancied her and I knew she found him attractive and his attentions flattering. So I coaxed and encouraged her to take things further.....from flirting to the consummation, There was such an emotional mix of feelings, but the urge for her to take a lover, a bigger, better man, and for us to to become a cuckold is just too strong to resist.
These days there is less emotional turmoil. There is no longer jealousy or worry on my part, and i love that she is now exclusive to him. I relish my cuckold status, my inadequacies in the bedroom. I delight in how he makes her feel, how he does things with her she never did with me. How he makes her feel...she just is so confident and sexy these days.
For us, with Jayne having a long term lover, adds more intensity rather than just a physical encounter. It gives us the opportunity to explore deeper into the cuckold lifestyle.
As cucks I think we have to step back, give/allow our wives up to their lovers to develop their intimate relationship, to distance ourselves sexaully to fully appreciate the exquisite delight of being a cuckold.
It would be good to chat further, compare experiences and desires.
Take care
Andy