Not Watching: A follow up question to our earlier question about Watching

[Guest SandL]

This is S from S and L and its a question concerning the “lifestyle.” Any thoughtful responses that might help are readily accepted as that is why we joined this site. As I think we have said before, we don’t have people in our circles where we can ask these kinds of questions. Any feedback we have received has been helpful and we welcome all the wisdom we can get. 

With that, here’s my question.

If you’ve read my wife’s stories/posts and especially the most recent ones, you’ll know that we have taken the step into me watching her with her “guy.” Why I decided to watch had a lot to do with our/my/her interactions with many of you on this site. The majority of those interactions were helpful and overall positive and encouraging. We may not be going about this the same way that everyone else does, but I’m sure that can be said for everyone. I would imagine that each couple’s approach is as different as the makeup of each couple is surely different. That being said, I did recently “watch.” For all intents and purposes, it was a good experience. The difficulty I have now is not “watching”, but “not watching”, if that makes sense. As we speak, L is with her “guy”. I’m not in any way going crazy because she’s alone with him. I have been aware of many midday dates while I’m at work and haven’t had even the slightest bit of angst. I’ve read a lot about the so called “angst” and I don’t think its the proper word. The word implies worry and dread. That is not what I felt before I watched, though there was some lower levels of trepidation as we neared the event. But I wouldn’t call it angst. And “angst” is not what I’m feeling now. But at the same time, now that I’ve seen them together, my emotions are certainly very different and very heightened. But again, not in the sense of “angst”. One of you commented on our “Watching” post that I will feel a very real need to “reclaim” my wife after witnessing her with another man. I can attest that that is very much the case and was spot on. I went about “reclaiming” her for the next 3 or 4 days. Not in an overtly competitive context as I don’t feel threatened. But I will admit a stronger attraction to her. That is altogether confusing but not something I feel I need to fix. I rather enjoy the stronger attraction and so does she.  But I guess my question surrounds the inescapable thoughts I have about what they are doing now and how sexually drawn I am to her and how the clock simply won’t move fast enough. And here’s my question:

Will that continue with the same force as we make our way through this journey or will it fade or morph into a different kind of excitement altogether. 

Again, I appreciate all responses and will thoughtfully consider all of them. 

S 

[Guest SandL]

I guess I should say that both public and private comments are welcome. 

[Naughty Nicki]

👋🏼 Hi Steve, I was hoping you’d write something to some degree about how you felt.  If I may assume you were referring to my comment about reclaiming your wife, if so, I wasn’t meaning it as in a competition more of a reaffirming your love for one another. 

But to answer your question, in short, yes it will continue. It may lessen with  intensity but each time you know or see her with another, you will undoubtably want her. 

[Guest SandL]

5 minutes ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

👋🏼 Hi Steve, I was hoping you’d write something to some degree about how you felt.  If I may assume you were referring to my comment about reclaiming your wife, if so, I wasn’t meaning it as in a competition more of a reaffirming your love for one another. 

But to answer your question, in short, yes it will continue. It may lessen with  intensity but each time you know or see her with another, you will undoubtably want her. 

Hello to you. First of all, L speaks highly of you and so that goes a long way with me.

Secondly, you’re welcome for some of my thoughts, though its not the detailed description L was looking for. She can be rather insistent about getting what she wants so I like to withhold some things from her. Ha. Writing is more her thing, anyway. 

Thirdly, thank you for your insight. I’m not upset about this continuing but it certainly makes focusing on my job more difficult. Ha. Fortunately, nothing is necessarily pressing at work today. I left for work almost 5 hours ago now with another almost 6 to go...I guess this will be a long day. Gratefully, it will also make for a long night! 

S 

[Naughty Nicki]

Thank you and her

you did not have to say much, it’s more in how you said it, you can tell that not only do you love her very much but enjoyed Friday night as well by your actions of the last 3-4 days  

At first it can very distracting and almost overwhelming at times especially when you keep looking at the clock and there is nothing that can take your mind off her. Fortunately you are right, it will make for a enjoyable evening/night after such the build up of today. 

[Guest SandL]

2 minutes ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

Thank you and her

you did not have to say much, it’s more in how you said it, you can tell that not only do you love her very much but enjoyed Friday night as well by your actions of the last 3-4 days  

At first it can very distracting and almost overwhelming at times especially when you keep looking at the clock and there is nothing that can take your mind off her. Fortunately you are right, it will make for a enjoyable evening/night after such the build up of today. 

You’re very welcome. And after re-reading my initial question, now I see what you mean. I guess I did reveal how I felt through my actions. I actually laughed out loud at how obvious it appears. 

“Overwhelming” is a good description. And to your earlier response, a lessened intensity of being overwhelmed will be good. So that was very helpful. Thank you. 

S

[Naughty Nicki]

Not just the lessening of the overwhelmingness, but being so distracted as well, it will always be on your mind, but it will be controllable, you will always want her, But it will be bearable. This lifestyle has the potential to create an amazingly close and tight bonds in a relationship. 

[Guest SandL]

2 minutes ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

Not just the lessening of the overwhelmingness, but being so distracted as well, it will always be on your mind, but it will be controllable, you will always want her, But it will be bearable. This lifestyle has the potential to create an amazingly close and tight bonds in a relationship. 

With where we are now, she certainly likes to know that she is on my mind. She has always been that way and always encouraged me to let her know where my mind is in one way or another. To ensure that, she has always liked to motivate me. Ha. And making sure that I’m thinking about her has increased exponentially since we entered this lifestyle. And we could probably double that since Friday. She was always flirty, but now she’s a definite tease. Ha. 

[Naughty Nicki]

2 minutes ago, SandL said:

With where we are now, she certainly likes to know that she is on my mind. She has always been that way and always encouraged me to let her know where my mind is in one way or another. To ensure that, she has always liked to motivate me. Ha. And making sure that I’m thinking about her has increased exponentially since we entered this lifestyle. And we could probably double that since Friday. She was always flirty, but now she’s a definite tease. Ha. 

In saying just that little bit right there, she thinks the world of you and it really matters to her what you think and what your opinions are. Exponentially is a good word to describe that, and it will continue to grow as well for some time. Again it will level off but being that it’s new,  embrace it and enjoy it, you guys are right where you should be, in love and enjoying life  

I may be the guilty part and the one to blame for her teasing,  to me it adds just a tad more fun to an aready sexually charged situation. 

[Guest SandL]

1 minute ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

In saying just that little bit right there, she thinks the world of you and it really matters to her what you think and what your opinions are. Exponentially is a good word to describe that, and it will continue to grow as well for some time. Again it will level off but being that it’s new,  embrace it and enjoy it, you guys are right where you should be, in love and enjoying life  

I may be the guilty part and the one to blame for her teasing,  to me it adds just a tad more fun to an aready sexually charged situation. 

I would definitely agree with you insofar as we are closer now and would even say that we are more in love now than ever. That was certainly an unexpected benefit that took us by surprise...especially me. 

You’re the guilty part? Ha. If so, that would explain why she asked me to promise not to read your private conversations with her. I will keep that promise but its going to be hard. Ha. But I would never blame her teasing on anyone. She’s a natural. 

S 

[Naughty Nicki]

Yes, that is just one of the major benefits that normal society doesn’t get or understand. 

Yes, I’m partially to blame for this morning, but in my defense, lol,  I did tell her it would drive you crazy and insanely nuts all day. I’m sorry. 

[Guest SandL]

1 minute ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

Yes, that is just one of the major benefits that normal society doesn’t get or understand. 

Yes, I’m partially to blame for this morning, but in my defense, lol,  I did tell her it would drive you crazy and insanely nuts all day. I’m sorry. 

Oh now its becoming clearer. Ha. You were aware of this morning? Then you’re also “partially” responsible for this post. Ha. For your own benefit then, quite honestly, this morning may have strangely been one of the hottest 5-10 minute episodes of our entire married life. I’m sure she’ll write a story about it. Ha 

[Naughty Nicki]

Ummmm,  I had an idea of it yesterday  😊 and yes, I knew of it this morning so yes ✋🏼 Guilty, and guilty.  And the results, is what I was hoping for.  👏🏼👏🏼

[Guest SandL]

4 minutes ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

Ummmm,  I had an idea of it yesterday  😊 and yes, I knew of it this morning so yes ✋🏼 Guilty, and guilty.  And the results, is what I was hoping for.  👏🏼👏🏼

I’m glad I could update you on your work and give you some satisfaction for all your efforts. Ha. Sadly, I’m just now realizing that this conversation is playing into her hands and will only work to fuel her in the future. Not entirely convinced if that is good or bad. 

L, if you read this, this morning had no effect on me. 

S

[Naughty Nicki]

Well, you did validate my efforts, lol, so tyvm 💋.  And it’s not so much playing into her hands as I’m hoping it will benefit you both, and ummm, yes it might just fuel me a little to egg her on some more for you.  And I promise that it will be good, in a bad way, or is it bad in a good way, lol. either or  I’ll try to make it a little more fun and intense than what it already is. 😈😈

[Guest SandL]

1 minute ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

Well, you did validate my efforts, lol, so tyvm 💋.  And it’s not so much playing into her hands as I’m hoping it will benefit you both, and ummm, yes it might just fuel me a little to egg her on some more for you.  And I promise that it will be good, in a bad way, or is it bad in a good way, lol. either or  I’ll try to make it a little more fun and intense than what it already is. 😈😈

It is definitely benefitting us both. I hope I didn’t give the wrong impression. We are both enjoying it all very much. But, I’m sure that’s obvious and I’m sure you know more than I’m aware that you know. But thanks again. 

S

[Naughty Nicki]

Oh no, not a bad impression at all, I think you both are great. I love where you two are at and I really enjoy helping you guys getting there. 

[Guest SandL]

12 minutes ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

Oh no, not a bad impression at all, I think you both are great. I love where you two are at and I really enjoy helping you guys getting there. 

Thank you, very much. We’re really enjoying the path we’re on and also glad that we found this site. It’s been helpful in so many ways. 

S 

[Guest SandL]

If you’re going to be writing on here all the time, Steve you might as well start contributing to the other ones that I wrote! Hmmmmmm?   But since you haven’t, I’ll throw my two cents in here 😂 

So tell us more about how difficult today was...pleeeaaassseee! 😂 

L

[Naughty Nicki]

We had some very great people helping us when we were first starting out and we try to pass it on the new people. 

[Guest SandL]

12 minutes ago, SandL said:

If you’re going to be writing on here all the time, Steve you might as well start contributing to the other ones that I wrote! Hmmmmmm?   But since you haven’t, I’ll throw my two cents in here 😂 

So tell us more about how difficult today was...pleeeaaassseee! 😂 

L

No

[Guest SandL]

11 minutes ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

We had some very great people helping us when we were first starting out and we try to pass it on the new people. 

Paying it forward, I guess. That’s great. If we’re ever in such a position, we’ll try and do the same. 

[Naughty Nicki]

Just now, SandL said:

No

Cum on, plzzzzzzzzzzz. 😈

[Naughty Nicki]

Just now, SandL said:

Paying it forward, I guess. That’s great. If we’re ever in such a position, we’ll try and do the same. 

That’s is all I ask. 💋

[Guest SandL]

1 minute ago, Hotwife/cuck luvR said:

That’s is all I ask. 💋

That we can do.