Jump to content
CuckoldFart.com

secondjag

Members
  • Posts

    14778
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    825

Everything posted by secondjag

  1. not really sure what I want to say about these ( 3 vids) 273387728_OldBBWFriendRidingMe.mp4 2053904460_HurtinMyPussySoGood.mp4 Interracial Screamer.mp4
  2. secondjag

    Umm

    During Sir Thomas Beecham's half-century career as conductor of some of the great orchestras of the world, he developed a reputation as a man with a caustic wit and an acerbic tongue.At a rehearsal of the London Philharmonic one day, Beecham became increasingly frustrated by the subpar performance of the orchestra's female cellist.Finally, in exasperation, he said: "Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands. And all you can do is scratch it!" I had recently retired, but was not ready to just hang around the house. So, I heard the local WalMart was seeking a few of us retirees to work as Greeters. I applied for the job, and began the following Monday. On my first day, a very loud, unattractive, mean, nasty woman walked into Wal-Mart with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. I said pleasantly, "Good morning, and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?" The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't. The oldest one's 12 and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?" "I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am," I replied. "I just couldn't believe someone would fuck you twice…." Looks like this job is not for me.
  3. secondjag

    Umm

    Two brothers enlisting in the Army were getting their physical exams. During the inspection, the doctor was surprised to discover that both of them possessed incredibly long, oversized penises. "How do you account for this?" he asked the brothers. "It's hereditary, sir," the older one replied. "I see," said the doctor, writing in his file. "Your father's the reason for your elongated penises?" "No sir, our mother." "Your mother? You idiot, women don't have penises!" "I know, sir," replied the recruit. "But she only had one arm, and when it came to getting us out of the bathtub, she had to manage as best she could." A construction worker walks into a bar. He's a rather large, menacing guy. He orders a beer, chugs it back, and then bellows, "All you guys on this side of the bar are cocksuckers!"A sudden silence descends. After a moment, he asks, "Anyone got a problem with that?" The silence lengthens.He then chugs back another beer and growls, "And all you guys on this side of the bar are motherfuckers!"Once again, the bar is silent. He looks around belligerently and roars, "Anyone got a problem with that?"A lone man gets up from his stool unsteadily and starts to walk towards the man. The construction worker looks the man square in the eye and says, "You got a problem, buddy?""Oh no," insists the man. "I'm just on the wrong side of the bar."
  4. let's see if these work. mostly just fun stuff (3 vids) T and A.mp4 One cock isn’t enough.wmv More car fun2.mp4
  5. secondjag

    Umm

    An attractive young med student was having coffee with her girlfriend, and was complaining about her fiancée's extraordinary sexual appetite."I barely have the strength to come to work in the morning," she murmured. "And now that he's on his vacation, things will probably be even more intense when he gets back.""How long is he off?" the assistant inquired."It varies," she replied. "But usually, it's just long enough to smoke a cigarette." An 80-year old man was having his annual checkup, and the doctor asked him how he was feeling. "I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen-year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?" The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day, he went out in a bit of a hurry, and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun." The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods, and suddenly a beaver appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the beaver and squeezed the handle. And do you know what happened?" the doctor queried. Dumbfounded, the old man replied, "No." The doctor continued, "The beaver dropped dead in front of him!" "That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that beaver." "That's kind of what I'm getting at," replied the doctor.
  6. need something to get this party started ( 3 vids) Her car.mp4 BBC his car.mp4 Sunday bj.mp4
  7. secondjag

    Umm

    well, well, well, 20 pages of fun During a good manners and etiquette class, the teacher says to her students: "If you were courting a well-educated young girl from a prominent family and during a dinner for two you needed to go to the toilet, what would you say to her?" Mike replies "Wait a minute, I'm going for a p." The teacher says: "That would be very rude and improper on your part." Charlie replies: "I'm sorry I need to go to the toilet, I'll be back in a minute." The teacher says: "That's much better but to mention the word ''toilet'' during a meal, is unpleasant." And Billy says: "My dear, please excuse me for a moment. I have to go shake hands with a personal friend, whom, I hope, to be able to introduce to you after dinner. " The teacher passed out…. "What's the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball." How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Blondes don't screw in light bulbs. They screw in Jacuzzis A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit pissed off, grabs the sheet and rolls over and says: "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question." A boy in the sixth grade comes home after school one day. His mother notices that he's got a big smile on his face.She asks, "Did anything special happen at school today?""Yes, Mom. I had sex with my English teacher!"The mother is stunned. "You're going to talk about this with your father when he gets home."Well, when dad comes home and hears the news he is pleased as punch. Beaming with pride, he walks over to his son and says, "Son, I hear you had sex with your English teacher.""That's right, Dad.""Well, you became a man today - this is cause for celebration. Let's head out for some ice cream, and then I'll buy that new bike you've been asking for.""That sounds great, Dad, but can I have a football instead? My ass is killing me."
  8. not sure if these will work (5 vids) 3WAY.mp4 Sneeze.mp4 She’s making sure he knows who owns him..wmv more car fun.mp4 Gettin stuffed with some black cock..wmv
×
×
  • Create New...